Woman who was child bride speaks out on forced marriages, domestic abuse and how she transformed her life
She is now 34 and a single mother-of-two, but refuses to let her bad experiences grind her down and is using them to help and inspire other victims.
A woman who was forced to marry a man twice her age who she’d never met when she was just 15 is now forging a new life for herself as a beauty queen and charity campaigner.
As well as being a child bride, Rubie Marie was also a domestic violence victim for five years.
She is now 34 and a single mother-of-two, but refuses to let her bad experiences grind her down and is using them to help and inspire other victims.
And she is speaking out during August because she says that is the “hot month” for parents to take their teenage daughters abroad during the holidays to trick them into forced marriages.
Rubie is now living in the Midlands with her 17-year-old daughter by the husband she was forced to marry, and a son, 15, from her violent relationship.
She is single again having split from her latest boyfriend.
Originally from Wales, she ended up in the Midlands 17 years ago when she fled her forced marriage.
Rubie went with her parents on holiday to Bangladesh when she was 15, shortly after her 17-year-old sister had “brought shame on the family” by running away to marry a man they didn’t approve of.
But at the end of the trip when she was due to return home to the UK to do her GCSEs, her parents announced they were staying longer in Bangladesh.
“The penny dropped when my father mentioned whilst having dinner ‘wouldn’t it be great if Rubie got married’,” she said.
“I just locked myself in the room, crying, refusing to come out and see any of them.”
Eventually a suitable husband was found and Rubie met him for the first time two weeks later on their wedding day and was shocked to see he was 15 years older than her.
The wedding went ahead and at first Rubie tried to avoid getting pregnant by secretly taking contraception.
But then her husband’s sister found out, threw away the pills, told the family and within weeks Rubie was pregnant.
By now the family was back in the UK and when her daughter was two months old Rubie ran away with another man to start a new life in the Midlands.
Her father disowned her and because she was underage at the time of the wedding her marriage was dissolved.
But that new relationship ended after five years when her new partner was violent to her and she fled again, with their young son and daughter.
Undeterred and with two young children to care for, she started to rebuild her life.
She took her GCSEs, began modelling, and did university level counselling qualifications and trained as a life coach.
She also discovered the beauty pageant circuit and last year was crowned Ms Galaxy UK after taking part in the over 30s category and went on to win the international title of Ms Galaxy 2017.
She is an ambassador for a charity that supports victims of honour crimes and forced marriage, as well as volunteering with mental health charities.
“August is the hot month for forced marriages,” she said.
Rubie said, from her experience: “Girls go away on holiday to Bangladesh with their parents, but many don’t return because they are married off.”
“I’ve always been about turning my negatives into positives that’s why I enter pageants because they give me a platform to share my experiences.
“I want people to hear my story – so they can see that someone like me who went through the worst came out the other side.”
She is continuing with her pageant work and her next one will be the Ms Earth contest in November.
http://www.birminghammail.co.uk/news/midlands-news/child-bride-speaks-out-forced-13429971